Friday, May 8, 2009
home doesnt seems like a place to go back to. everyday its school. work(when there is) and bcak to that shagged place that ive to call home.
A place where one lives; a residence.
2. The physical structure within which one lives, such as a house or apartment.
3. A dwelling place together with the family or social unit that occupies it; a household.
4.
a. An environment offering security and happiness.
b. A valued place regarded as a refuge or place of origin.
5. The place, such as a country or town, where one was born or has lived for a long period.
6. The native habitat, as of a plant or animal.
7. The place where something is discovered, founded, developed, or promoted; a source.
which of these apply to me. none.
my definition of home.
1. the never ending of miserable preaches from her.
2. enduring the pain of looking a a happy family. im never included.
3. the occasion assult from her. its not the physical pain that ive gta endur, my threshold for pain is pretty high but its pretty much on the mental scars thats been left bhind. for all these years ive never seen myself as a possible person in the scenario of family abuse. but seens like its coming ture.
so much for wanting to change for rthe better. the other one inside me is eating me up to go back to my ways.at the very least i seek refugee under the manipulation of it. the very least i could ask for now. to be free from the pain and misery of this pathetic world.
going back to god? im ashamed. im not going back until im at my wits end. not until i can forgive myself i know going back to it once agn its just gna sink me further down but what choice do i have left?
you left me for a goodamn dont know how long and im to come back as and when im told?
A place where one lives; a residence.
2. The physical structure within which one lives, such as a house or apartment.
3. A dwelling place together with the family or social unit that occupies it; a household.
4.
a. An environment offering security and happiness.
b. A valued place regarded as a refuge or place of origin.
5. The place, such as a country or town, where one was born or has lived for a long period.
6. The native habitat, as of a plant or animal.
7. The place where something is discovered, founded, developed, or promoted; a source.
which of these apply to me. none.
my definition of home.
1. the never ending of miserable preaches from her.
2. enduring the pain of looking a a happy family. im never included.
3. the occasion assult from her. its not the physical pain that ive gta endur, my threshold for pain is pretty high but its pretty much on the mental scars thats been left bhind. for all these years ive never seen myself as a possible person in the scenario of family abuse. but seens like its coming ture.
so much for wanting to change for rthe better. the other one inside me is eating me up to go back to my ways.at the very least i seek refugee under the manipulation of it. the very least i could ask for now. to be free from the pain and misery of this pathetic world.
going back to god? im ashamed. im not going back until im at my wits end. not until i can forgive myself i know going back to it once agn its just gna sink me further down but what choice do i have left?
you left me for a goodamn dont know how long and im to come back as and when im told?
